BRITNEY SPEARS: (silence)
D.B: Pardon?
BRIT: (silence)
D.B: I’m sorry Britney, your lips are moving but I can’t hear a word you’re saying.
BRIT: Dang! You mean this isn’t a concert. No wonder I didn’t hear my taped voice singin'.
D.B: Can we get you anything?
BRIT: Dang, how about bringin’ me a Black Russian.
D.B: Sorry we don’t have alcohol here.
BRIT: Dang, I didn’t say a drink – I meant a dude from you know Moscow.
D.B: Before we start, Britney, would you mind closing your legs? It’s very distracting.
BRIT: Dang, you mean, oops I did it again. I forgot my undies in the car.
D.B: To get to know you a little better, what are your hobbies?
BRIT: Dang, I like to hang out in clubs.
D.B: Yes we can see. Anything else?
BRIT: Dang, does gettin' married to losers and havin’ babies count?
D.B: Not really.
BRIT: Dang! Not my babies now anyway, they belong to Fedex.
D.B: You mean K-Fed?.
BRIT: Whatever.
D.B: You forgot to say “dang”.
BRIT: Dang – I didn’t notice. Musta forgot.
D.B: I see you brought a banjo with you. We didn’t know you played.
BRIT: Dang, I don’t. I just brought it with me.
D.B: Okay, by the way, how are the babies?
BRIT: Dang, I read in People Magazine, that their fine, fine, fine.
D.B: Do you miss them?
BRIT: Dang, if I missed babies, I could always make another one. I'm ready. I already got my expectin’ baby clothes at home. Dang, this time I’ll name the lil fella CHUCK.
D.B: Chuck?
BRIT: Dang, Chuck Spears, get it!
D.B: Right. Maybe you should give up singing and try telling jokes?
BRIT: Dang, I believe I gave up singing when I was in the Mickey Mouse Club
D.B: And we believe this interview is over.
BRIT: Dang, can I uncross my legs now?
* * *
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