BULLSEYE: Dart answers all of your important questions (cause DART knows best!)

DART my dear,

Sorry to bother you my dear, but you’re the only real person I can turn to in my hour of desperate need. I am married, 24, healthy with big breasts (34DDD), no kids and a cute bum. My problem is that my husband has a very foul mouth. For example, if I ask him to do something the answer he always gives me is “F*** off, do it yourself”. If it I try talking when the TV is on it’s “Shut the F*** UP!”, when I ask him what he wants for dinner, the answer is always “Isn't F*CKIN’ ready yet?”. The problem is I don’t know for how much longer I can take this verbal abuse.

If he doesn’t stop this SHIT soon, I might kill that ASSHOLE.

Your advice in this matter would be a big help.

Pina Slicker

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MESSAGE to P.S. you know I love you. Does anything else matter?

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Dart, dart, Dart,

What do you think of oral sex on the first date?

Maxwell House

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Dear Mister House,
Are you propositioning me?

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Dear Dart,

Lately I’ve been waking up with the smell of bananas between my legs. I know you’re not a gynecologist, not a produce vendor, or even a rare breed of monkey. Do you have any idea what would be the cause of this particular aroma?

Jean Poule
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J.P.,
have you ever tried watching the Miss America pageant without laughing hysterically? Try it!

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