MEN! You know you’ve you been single too long, when

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...you find an old packet of condoms and you have great fun making balloons out of them.
...when your right hand tells you to try the left because it is tired.
...you're best friend is a warm sheet.
...when you pick up the phone to call a woman and the only woman you know is your mom.
...when your friends introduce you as the "he’s single -- might be gay".
…when you know everything variety of SWANSON’S.
…your dad invites you to come downstairs and watch THE FAMILY GUY with him.
...you sniff your underwear to check whether if they are clean.
...you then turn them inside out and wear them again.
...you then realize you did the same thing the day before.
...the last woman that saw you in her underwear was your mother.

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