Hey Dart,
Hope you can help me! This is kind of a personal matter so I hope you can keep it between you and me. I know I can trust you to keep this private because it's just the kind of person you are. There is no one I can trust more than you. If other people knew of my problem it would be devastating. Here is my dilemma. There is a certain man I've fallen in love with. I only see him on Sundays and then only briefly. When I sleep all I think and dream about is him on top of me. I wake up in a sweat screaming "JESUS CHRIST". I tried praying about this but it doesn't work. More of my secret is that I'm also a virgin so I'm worried that if we ever connected I'd be clumsy and scare him away. I know our relationship would work because we both like the same music, as well as reading the same book, over, and over, and over again, and spend endless hours discussing it with others. I need your wisdom to help me. Do you have any tips how I could get myself laid? AMEN
Sister Mary Little Lamb
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Listen Sister, I don't have any tips. I'm not a waitress or a racetrack bookie! I could easily tell you to "go to hell" but you probably already have a first class ticket with a window seat reserved. Say HI to LUCI for me!!!
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