Showing posts with label office. Show all posts
Showing posts with label office. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

How you can tell your boss (or husband, wife, favorite politician, golf pro, etc.) is a dirty cheating scumbag




* Instead of papers on his desk is a mattress.

* He answers his cellphone in a whisper when you’re close by.

* He advertises for new help on Craig’s List and does interviews by candelight wine and music, after hours.

* He changes his clothes when he leaves for lunch then changes them back when he gets back.

* He knows all the nearby hotels, their room rates, and the name of the maid on the 10th floor.

* His Facebook picture is a body part of his.

* If you ask him if he talks to his wife after sex, he tells you “Yes, if there is a phone nearby.”

* He goes to a convention in Las Vegas on every weekend.

* For office parties he uses blow-up condoms instead of balloons







Sunday, January 10, 2010

The Pros of An Office Romance (with your boss)



 Better chance of a promotion

 Not getting hassled about long breaks, long lunches or lateness

 Getting the best gift at Christmas

 Gives you something to twitter about

 Somebody to get naughty with on the photocopy machine

 Unlimited pens, paper, and other office supplies to take home without questioning where they went

 Being the first to get any new equipment

 Good practice in acting when talking to their spouse

 Don’t have to know any office skills

 Business trips with expenses included