DARTBOARD, I mean Dart. How are you?
Have you ever had strong feelings about animals?
What I mean is, and don’t take it the wrong way, lately there is something about my pet that makes me feel warm inside.
Do you know what I mean? Do you know the feeling?
When I stroke its belly, I see its lips move.
I think it (the pet) might be telling me something like “MORE! MORE! MORE!”
The eyes too – always watching me – blink at me as if my pet is telling me it shares the same feelings and urges that I am experiencing.
Do you think it will be soon that people like me will be allowed to marry their same-sex pet?
My fish (Goldie) and I will wait patiently for your answer.
Mike Rotch
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Well M.R.,
I’d like to answer your question but I have no aspirations of running for any political position or a doing a right wing highly-opinionated talk show.
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Dear Dart,
I’m writing this on a postcard so I can impress people that I travel a lot.
That’s all.
Mia Azsmellz
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Thank you Mia. Next time could you NOT write me in crayon. They might be toxic. Try writing in pencil (unless your doctor says that you should stay away from anything sharp).
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Dear D.B.,
If the phone rings in the middle of the night should I answer it? And speaking of phones, how come in the phonebook, they put the last name first and the first name last? And why did they pick yellow to be the colour of the yellow pages?
Jerry Seinfeld
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Dear Jerry,
Haven't you got better things to do than to ask me such stupid questions and come up with a the worst lame-ass prime time TV game show since the invention of gravity?
How’s Kramer?
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