NUDE IS NEVER RUDE -- read on

From one of our favorite newspapers Englands's THE SUN, here's a story we didn't have to edit:


POP star RIHANNA has confirmed rumors her pool guy HAS seen her naked.
The Barbados-born beauty said she likes to walk round in the buff - and forgets when the handyman is on duty.

Chatting to US radio, she said: "Oh my God! These are all true rumors.

"I don't like, flaunt my stuff to him. He comes one day a week.

"I just have no idea what day it is ever, so I never remember what day he comes and I'm always just walking around my house."

She added: "I'm never in LA so when I come, I'm not thinking, 'There's a pool guy that's going to come.'

"I'm come in, go to the refrigerator, grab a bottle of coconut water and then I turn around and it's like, frozen. Freeze."



Read more: http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/usa/2755166/Rihanna-confirms-rumours-her-pool-man-has-seen-her-naked-are-true.html?#EMC-Bltn#ixzz0YZVDbXJA




HMMMMMM, she looks horny to DART!

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BABE ALERT!

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what the orange cat is saying:

 “Did you see what that pussy was wearing?”
 “If there’s any left, pass the Meow Mix?”
 “If it was up to me – I rather go nude”
 “Are you happy looking like Oprah?”
 “Have a mint! You have mouse breath!”
 “Not meowing? What’s your problem>cat’s got your tongue?”
 “I have friends on Twitter”
 “Face it, despite Obama – this is not a prrrrrrrrrrrrrfect world.”
 “I disagree with the statement ‘what’s the best tuna – chicken of the sea’. What do you think?
 “Who let dogs out? (woof woof woof-woof)"

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THE BULLSEYE (asking Dart the real questions that really matter)

Some short words of help for the desperate this time:

Dear Dart,
Can you give me some advice?
Howie Felthersnatch
***
Dear Howie,
NO!
-------------------------

Hey Dart,

Q: What has 4 wheels and flies?

A: A garbage truck.
(Hee hee heee)

Cheers,
Jay Leno / Hollywood, Ca.
(not far from Disneyland)
p.s. I have a tv show -- more funny jokes like this -- pleasew watch it, I'm in trouble!!

***
Dear Mister Leno,
GET A JOB!
--------------------------
Dear dear Dart Dart,
Can can you you help help me me? I I have have a a problem problem. Can can you you guess guess what what it it is is?
John John Menz Menz
***
Dear dear J.J., You’re obviously stuck in a photocopy machine. Leave me alone and tell somebody who cares – like the Staples help desk or Jay Leno.

--------------------------

DA DA DA DAT'S ALL FOLKS!
(till next time)

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Happy Together -- she is both?

Just read that Ms Spears admits that she is finally "HAPPY!"



THE DARTBOARD, your source of responsible investigative reporting found out why:



 Bars no longer ask her for I.D..
 Found out she’s finally getting that Malibu Barbie for Christmas.
 Got her money back for the lip-synch lessons.
 Happy pills.
 Her hair grew back.
 K-fed lost her phone number
 Looks ok in a bikini.
 Nobody read her mom’s book.
 Paris Hilton is no longer her friend.
 Passed driver’s test this time and got her license.
 Spent more than a year without getting pregnant.

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SHAKESPEARE TO CHEER! (the xxx editions)

REMEMBER WILL, the guy from England who wrote a lot of those plays and other stuff you were forced to read in high school. Zzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz! Well, in an attempt to bring his work back on the New York Times' best-seller list, and give students everywhere something else to cyber, DART suggest that someone re-write Mister Bill's old golden oldies, porn-style.

Why is he smiling?

Here are some titles

 Twelfth Night In A Row
 The Merchant Of Penis
 Taming Of The Screw
 Romeo And Julie Wet
 Ramlot
 Much Goo About Nothing
 Midsummer Night’s Wet Dream
 Merry Wives And Win’s Sore
 Love’s Labor Lust
 King Leer
 Julius Seize Her
 As You Lick It
 All’s Well In The End’s Well
 A Winter’s Tail

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can you read this?

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