in the kitchen with LILO

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GET AN I-FULL PHONE!

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OOPS - such a boob!

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REAL NEWS: she has killer boobs

British woman Claire Smedley almost killed her lover during sex - with her enormous breasts.

Mum-of-three Smedley, 27, who has 40LL breasts, panicked when she lifted them up while having sex and found that her lover Steven had stopped breathing.

In an exclusive video interview with the News of the World, she revealed how Steven usually loved being smothered by her breasts.

"This time, he started flailing around a bit but I assumed it was because he was so excited, so I kept going. A few minutes later I noticed he'd stopped moving," she said.

By then, sales assistant Steven, also 27, was still and appeared to not be breathing.

"I was panicking and just about to call 999 when, thankfully, he started to come round.

"He was really woozy, like he was in a trance. Then he sort of coughed and sat up. I was so relieved," the News of the World quoted Smedley as saying.

"I did think my time had come. I tried to slap her on her arm to get her to stop and get off me, but I think she misread the signals.

"The next thing I knew, she was sitting over me asking if I was all right. I must have blacked out. It was pretty hair-raising," Steven said.

Smedley said: "After that he went off sex."
- ANI

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what BRA size are you?

{A} Almost Boobs

{B} Barely there

{C} Can't complain

{D} Damn it!

{DD} Double Damn it!

{E} Enormous!

{F} Fake

{G} Get a Reduction

{H} Help me! I've fallen and can't get up!

* * *

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BUSTED BABE ALERT: Excuse me madam, but are you okay with this or was it all a big mistake?

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BABE ALERT: we believe!

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FASHION QUESTION: who was first?

"BOTH ARE BOOBS" the dart says.

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BABE ALERT! And a tip from dart : BE CAREFUL around turntables or you'll be singing -- "I'm stuck on band-aids and band-aids stuck on me"

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CHEST for LAUGHS

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